How do you explain something to someone if they haven’t experienced it?
I’m going to attempt to do just that.
Hopefully at the end of this post I have described how going on vacation to Hawaii made me a better person.
Did it have to be Hawaii? The answer is of course “no,” but it’s my experience and this is my blog and maybe somewhere in my words you can feel the undeniable reality that I have experienced by going on a vacation of a lifetime.
One of the hardest things I struggled with on this trip was trying to deal with the obvious entitlement issues my children displayed.
There were multiple meltdowns by the oldest, who has an empathy gene that I can’t even fathom and at times, can’t deal with, which leads to lots of crying for a boy at the age of nine because his mom doesn’t know what to do for him except try to ‘hug-it-out’ and talk about it.
My youngest was surprisingly the easiest to deal with, and I suppose at four years old he really had no choices but to go along with whatever mom and dad were doing.
And then there’s my little girl, who is, well, a little girly-girl. She cries almost every time she doesn’t get her way, and that happened often when plans were made without her consent and she didn’t like what we were doing including going out to posh restaurants with menus that had to rival any French establishment. Thank God they had white rice for her at those amazing places to eat.
In the end, my children literally told me that their favorite things about the trip were things we could have experienced closer to home, (visiting family, going to the beach and swimming in the pool) and although that was disappointing, I can’t expect a child (or perhaps my children) to understand how amazing and wonderful this trip was or what a privilege it was.
With all that said, the poor-raised child inside of me was screaming with joy almost the entire trip.
My uncle made reference to that when other friends came and said multiple times D’Andra “has a joy that’s always there no matter what we’re doing. I love hanging out with her.”
Those words will stick with me forever. It’s a compliment my mother received throughout her life and as far as I’m concerned, I’m doing something right if someone else can see that in me.
We went on this trip with my husband’s uncle, aunt and children, who have kids similar in age as ours, but who have completely different personalities. I won’t go into details, but I’ll just remind you that I recognize more now than ever how entitled my children seem to be. We’re going to start working on that.
The next thing that really changed me was how I felt about mid-vacation about my place of employment.
In my bosses defense, it wasn’t him that I’ve heard this from. (I’ve just heard it before by other ‘in charge’ people.)
In fact, as he is new to the specific governmental agency I work for, he said he makes less money here (than his last governmental agency job) and has way more work.
When he said that statement out loud to his employees, I thought to myself, “How is that supposed to motivate us?”
I’m just going to come out and say it: Some people are not meant to be in charge. Take that statement for what it is (or read into it more) but it’s just the truth about the reality I live in, and lately I have been very disappointed in decisions made by people in charge.
And that’s a really big but….
Hawaii changed me from being “disappointed.”
I stood on one of the many beaches we visited, looking at some of the most beautiful water I have ever seen (only Cancun, Mexico rivals it in beauty so far,) and I realized that this trip would not have been possible if I had given up on the job when things started going downhill.
And I’ve considered it going downhill for years now so that’s saying a lot.
I prayed on that beach in Hawaii as I watched the sun set.
I prayed for my children, my bosses, I was thankful for my mother and the Lord spoke to me on that beach as I prayed.
Whether or not you believe in that sort of thing, I do and I heard His whisper loud and clear: I will take care of you.
I gave any and all self-proclaimed “control” of the insane job situation to the Lord that day.
It’s one thing to say you’re going to do it, but it’s another thing completely to actually feel it leaving your shoulders and neck and back and heart.
I go back to work on Monday after taking my kiddos to their first day of school for the new year. I’m looking forward to the day. Very much. Which includes going back to work.
I haven’t said that in a while.
Come check out some of our pics from Hawaii by following me on Instagram, or just searching for the hashtag: #BSinHawaii.